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5 Secrets To A Great Life

5 Secrets To A Great Life

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Sonoma Vineyard

A new vineyard doesn’t produce enough quality grapes to harvest for several years.  Like the vineyard, we start young and grow into healthy and productive people.  Along the way, we learn habits and develop thinking patterns that hold us back from becoming truly, healthy, happy people with great lives.

Fortunately, the vineyard grower has learned secrets to growing healthy grapes.  The same is true for us.  There are secrets to getting what we want and using our God given talents and living a Great Life.

1) Forgive yourself.  We’ve all done things in the past that weren’t right and are holding us back from being happy.  Those things are in the past, now it’s time to leave them behind and be your own best friend.  Be nice yourself.

2)  Talk nicely to yourself.  We all talk to ourselves constantly without even thinking about what we’re saying.  Now is the time to monitor your thoughts and self talk and make sure we’re saying things that help and support ourselves instead of being mean to ourselves.

3)  Be Healthy.  The vineyard grower nurtures his vines making sure they get all the water, nutrients and care they need to become healthy.  We have to do the same thing with our mind, body and spirit.  When we eat well, exercise, read good books, study and take care of ourselves we are happier and healthier.

4)  Love.  If we want others to love us, we must first love ourselves, then love those around us, and mankind.  We all have conflicts and don’t feel loved.  Today’s society is filled with angry people.  It helps when we send “good vibes” and love out to everyone around us, those in our family, those we work with, and even the clerk in the store and the stranger walking down the street.  A example of how to do this is called Ho-opono-pono.  Here’s a link to an overview http://www.hooponoponohelp.com/.

5)  Focus.  Focus you mind on what you want, not on what you don’t want.  When we have a problem we tend to focus on it and that only creates more of it.  Our thoughts create our reality.  Meaning, if we focus on how mad our spouse or boss is, you will get more of that. If we focus on not having enough money, that’s what we’ll get.  Turn your thoughts around.  Focus your thoughts on and visualize and feel, what it would be like for your boss to be nice or to have plenty of money to pay all your expenses and see what happens.  Your mind is more powerful than any computer in the world and it controls our lives.  Put it to good use and think about having what you want rather than what you don’t have.  It works, whether on relationships, opportunities or anything else.

Count Your Blessing,  Here’s a bonus secret.  It’s probably the most important one. Stop and count the blessings you have now and say thank you for them.  All of us, no matter where we are have something to be thankful for.  When you appreciate and honor what you have other great things will come to you.

You’re a powerful person.  Enjoy your Great Life.

You’re Fired!

You’re Fired!

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This is a mouse pad found in a supervisor’s office.  What message is it sending?  In today’s economic conditions smart companies should be praising, motivating and training the employees they haven’t laid off.  Not threatening them and managing by fear.  Fear and threats are counter productive to your success.

Here are a few examples of poor management that damages morale  and productivity and scare away the success you are working for.

Getting the whip out and telling employees if they don’t increase sales, take more calls, produce more product they’ll be punished until they improve.  Once person described the situation as, “the floggings will continue until morale improves.”

Focusing on mistakes and poor customer comments and not praising and thanking employees for positive comments.  An employee I know said that if they receive a complaint or negative customer comment they are immediately punished and threatened to improve or get out.  He explained, in contrast positive customer comments are not acknowleged quickly or even at all some times. He was in a group of peers when another employee told the boss about a good letter he received.  The boss took it lightly and didn’t give him the praise he deserved.  They employee felt bad the rest of the day, didn’t work at his peak level and will remember this incident for the rest of his career.  As the boss was beginning to leave, another employee said that she had received 3 complimentary letters in the passed two weeks.  How did the boss respond?  He said, “that’s great” and turned and walked away!

At another company a memo was sent to employees saying recent results have shown a continuous positive trend in sales and employee performance.  You’d think that would be a good thing, right?  Well, it goes on to say that because employees performance is improving and business is improving, the company is going to raise the goals and targets for satisfactory performance and possible bonuses.  So, in other words, employees, you’re doing good now, so we’ll raise your goals to make it harder to reach them.  Does that make sense?

Are these good ways to praise employees and motivate them to work hard and be loyal to the company.  Will these actions help the company meet their goals and be successful?  Will they encourage employees to stay with the company?  Will employees want to recommend the company to their friends as a good, fun, great place to work?

The www.nielsongroup.com which “coaches organizations for breakthrough performance” explains fear motivation below.  I’ve underlined key words.

“There are three types of motivation. The first is FEAR MOTIVATION, a “do it or else we can replace you” approach. This motivation in negotiating is basically the “take it or leave it” approach. Fear motivation is the easiest form of motivation; however, it is a motivation based on intimidation. The person in power is unable to effectively create a climate for other types of beneficial motivation. The person in power resorts to fear tactics for motivation. “Take it or leave it” often gets results because the person will do what you ask for fear of loss. Fear motivation always results in inner anger and resentment against the person using the fear tactics. Sometimes the threat of loss or punishment for motivation must be used, but should only be used when all other methods have failed. Fear motivation is the lowest form of motivation and usually results in “when the cat is away, the mice will play.”  (taken from http://www.nielsongroup.com/articles/articles_climateformotivation.shtml). The other types of motivation are Incentive Motivation and Casual Motivation which take a much more positive approach and are much more successful.

So, ask yourself, what kind of motivation are you using with your group, family, kids, employees and those who look to you for leadership?  Is your approached working well, giving the results you want?  How do these people look at you, do they want to help you be a success, or is every encounter a struggle.

Are you proud of the type of person you are and the way you treat others?

And most of all, would you want to work for YOU?

 

Five Human Truths

Five Human Truths

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As we look at our lives from the solitude and darkness within, to the sunny landscape around us we realize each of us are very different and unique.  We all have our own voice and spirit that is unique to us.  No one else is exactly like us. As mentioned in my previous post Now Is The Time For Reflection, it’s important to take time, at least once per year, to take some personal, alone time to reflect on where we are now, if we are being true to ourselves and where we want to go in the future.

Even with this uniqueness there are some things that each of us needs, just like others around us.  The Starwood Hotels group describes them as the Five Human Truths.  They strive to fulfill them each time you are their guest.    What is it that all of us need to feel good?

The 5 Human Truths

1)  We need to be understood

2)  We want to belong

3)  We long to feel special

4)  We crave more control over our lives

5)  We dream of reaching our potential.

When you’re by yourself, reflecting on the future, be sure these basic needs as well as your unique needs are being met.  If they are, life will be easier and feel more fulfilled.

You deserve to Live Well and be the real YOU!

Do You Know Who You Are, really?

Do You Know Who You Are, really?

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We tend to attach our identity to one part of our lives.  It could be work, “I’m an accountant”, “I work for 3M”, or it could be a person, “I’m Mary’s husband”.  But aren’t you a whole lot more than that one thing?

Yes you are.  As an example, your job does not define you and it shouldn’t consumer all your waking thoughts.  Instead, honor all that you are and can be.  When you think of yourself as a whole person, your work, your relationships, your artistic side, your love of sports, and your charitable activities you will be happier.  That happiness will be projected out into the world and new people and opportunities will come your way.

So, how do you decide who you really are?

One way is to ask yourself the “I am …….” questions.

Get a piece of paper and write down “I am (a good person, happy, a good brother/husband/sister/wife)”.

As you do this it’s important to say the words out loud.  Say what you are out loud, then write it down.  It sounds simple, most good things are, but keep at it.  Fill the page up with your wonderful traits, habits, talents, etc.

When you’re done say them out loud everyday.  Soon, you’ll find yourself with more confidence, holding your head up high, being happier, living life with style, and show the world who you are.  Then you’ll attract new people into your life and you’ll help each other to live your dreams.

Give it a try, it can’t hurt.

(I’d like to thank Denise Silvernail for introducing me to this technique. When your web site is up I’ll refer readers to you.)

What Message Are You Sending?

What Message Are You Sending?

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Each of us create and send energy or vibes out to others and the world. That energy is then received and interpreted by others. They use the energy input to determine if and how they will react to us. This energy is being transmitted to others, constantly, and usually unconsciously. If you’re stuck in a rut or not being received the way you’d like, examine the energy you are putting out. That energy creates your present and future situation. So send positive energy to the Universe and it will come back to you in many ways, ways you’ve never dreamed of.

Go ahead, make some waves

Go ahead, make some waves

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What should I do?
What should I do?

Are you wondering if you should make a change in your life?  Should you take that plunge?  Is it safe?

Be brave. Go ahead and make some waves. Go For It.
Be brave. Go ahead and make some waves. Go For It.

If you dare, take the plunge.  You will encounter people and circumstances along the way that are there to help you in your journey.  Sometimes your path may be a little unclear but you will find your way if you’re willing to make some waves.  If you aren’t making waves, you’re not moving forward in life.  Go ahead, make some waves, even if they’re small ones.  You’ll be glad you did.   You will be closer to being the REAL you and Living Well.

Five Human Truths

Five Human Truths

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As we look at our lives from the solitude and darkness within, to the sunny landscape around us we realize each of us are very different and unique.  We all have our own voice and spirit that is unique to us.  No one else is exactly like us. As mentioned in my previous post Now Is The Time For Reflection, it’s important to take time, at least once per year, to take some personal, alone time to reflect on where we are now, if we are being true to ourselves and where we want to go in the future.

Even with this uniqueness there are some things that each of us needs, just like others around us.  The Starwood Hotels group describes them as the Five Human Truths.  They strive to fulfill them each time you are their guest.    What is it that all of us need to feel good?

The 5 Human Truths

1)  We need to be understood

2)  We want to belong

3)  We long to feel special

4)  We crave more control over our lives

5)  We dream of reaching our potential.

When you’re by yourself, reflecting on the future, be sure these basic needs as well as your unique needs are being met.  If they are, life will be easier and feel more fulfilled.

You deserve to Live Well and be the real YOU!

What Should I do?

What Should I do?

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Are you feeling lost, don’t know what to do with your life, are you at a cross-roads, is something bothering you and holding you back?  Maybe it’s time to look inside for the answer.

While exploring the grounds of the Golden Door Spa at The Boulders Resort outside Phoenix, I came across this labyrinth. It is said to be a path to tranquility inspired by ancient Hopi medicine wheels. It is found in most Native American tribes.  Many believe they enhance and balance and awaken our inner energy and creativity.  They are a place where answers can be found.

The Shaman told me to pick a rock, and carry it as I walked through the twists and turns.  Each turn, left and right, allow your brain to use the left side and right side thereby searching and opening both sides of your brain giving you a pure answer to your problem.  These thoughts blended with the earth’s energy create new perspective, ideas and answers.

At first I was somewhat skeptical, but as I concentrated and walked slowly through the labyrinth I found my mind calming down and powerful thoughts and feelings arising.  When I reached the center, I paused and put my rock, representing my problem, onto the pile of others problems.  I released my problem, letting  it go away.

After letting my problem or old beliefs go, I walk back through the turns to the beginning while feeling and thinking about the new me, minus my old problem.  By the time I reached the beginning I felt a lightness and hope for the future, free of my old problem.

Mother nature and it’s energy and you allowing your mind to slow down can reveal answers you never dreamed of.  If you give it an honest try, it might help you too.

Do You Need Goals?

Do You Need Goals?

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We all need  goals to get where we want to go.  Sometimes the goal is a simple as getting out of bed, or going to your favorite restaurant even if you are in your 90’s and it’s difficult to climb steps and walk very far.  Get up and keep going.

Write down your goals and write affirmations about how you’re going to achieve them.

Goals are best when stated simply with a detailed plan of how and when you’re going to achieve them.  Along with goals and affirmations, remember that “whatever you focus your mind on the most, is what you will create”.  So notice what you’re thinking about and make sure it’s something you want.

What goals do you have?

Maybe to hike 10 miles, to climb the 7 highest summits, to learn to tie your own shoe, to finish school, to start your own business, to pay off all your debt, to pay cash for everything, to retire comfortably, to have a loving relationship with a family member or friend, to lose weight or to travel the world.  Your goal can be as little or big as you want.  It’s your life, and they are your goals.  Choose wisely.

Here are two powerful statements about goals.  Think about them, they might help you achieve your dream.

1)     Dreams not written down are merely a wish.

2)    Those who do not have goals, will end up working for those who do.

So, what do you think, Do You Need Goals?

Career Meditation

Career Meditation

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Peaceful and Tranquil

When we become uptight and stressed, meditation can help clear our mind and get us back on the right path. This meditation is to help you improve your work and career.  Remember, Life is good today!

Career Stress Meditation

Now we’re going to improve your thoughts and life in relationship to your Career.

Choose and prepare where you will meditate today.  Choose a quiet spot where you won’t be disturbed.  Lower the lights, maybe light a candle.  If you want, turn on some quiet, soft music.

Get comfortable and relaxed, laying down or sitting down.

Take a deep breath and close your eyes.

Relax you body, your shoulders, arms, hands, fingers, legs, feet, and toes.

Breath deeply, inhaling slowly, holding it for a moment, then exhale through your open mouth as if you’re gently blowing out a candle.

Continue breathing, slowly, breathe in and out.

In and out, In and out.

Keep your mind focused on your breathing, slowly, gently, and deeply. Feel each breath going through your body.  Do so for two or three minutes.

Now, feel your whole body going into a deep relaxation. Feel your neck, your shoulders, your lower back, your chest, your heart, your arms, your hands, your fingers.  Shake them loose.

Take another deep breath, exhale slowly. Now your hips are relaxed, your legs, your feet and toes.  Wiggle your toes.

Now, breathing slowly, visualize yourself at your work.  Visualize the physical space you spend your working time in.

Notice how you feel, your muscles, your jaw, your neck and back, your mind and your heart.  How do you feel being in the area you work in?  Is it a desk, your home office, an assembly line, a retail store, wherever it is, visualize and feel that space.

Look around, there’s your customers, your co-workers, your boss. What do you feel like in your space?  Are you happy there, stressed, angry, unhappy, unappreciated?

Is it time for change?  Visualize and feel where you would be in your new environment.

Take a deep breath and exhale, relax, and breath again.  Feel these negative feelings fading.  Feel them flowing out of your fingers, the bottom of your feet and all the pores of your body.

Visualize a blue mist surrounding you.  The mist is blue as it is the color of truth, serenity and harmony, and helps to soothe the mind. It is good for cooling, calming, reconstructing and protecting.  It calms the body and mind, raising your frequency to attract the perfect people and opportunities for you.

From today on you will feel positive and relaxed about your life and career.  Life is good today and you’re starting a wonderful new journey.

Stay relaxed, breath in and out.

Now, in this relaxed state, think about how you want to feel at work and career.  What needs to change?  In your mind visualize being relaxed and happy.  Remember, you are bigger than your job.  Your identity is not defined by your job.  You are a unique, talented, skilled and complete person with a mission in life only you can complete.

Meditate on what you would be doing and how you will feel when you’re on the right path.  Take your time, visualizing every element.  Focus on how your want to feel, not every little detail.  The universe will fill in the details.

Maybe it’s still at your current job and things have changed for the better?  Is it somewhere new? What area, country, city or state are you in?  Are you inside or outside, with others or alone, are you working with your hands or your mind?  How do you feel there?  Feel your happiness and satisfaction.  Continue visualizing the perfect place for you and feel as if you are already there.

Continue this process until you have created the complete vision.  It may take several meditations before you see it clearly. With deep thought and searching you will be able to create your vision, one that is uniquely yours.

Now, take a very deep breath and release it slowly.  Feel your new energy and mental clarity.

Breath in and out.  You have begun your journey.  Keep this feeling alive in your heart and mind and use it daily.

Take a few more deep breaths and slowly open our eyes.  Sit for a minute to adjust to the light and energy in the room.

You create your own energy regardless of the situation you are in physically.  Keep your energy strong and stay on your journeys path.

Stand up, shake your body loose, now, take another step towards your new life.  Life is good today.

Written and copyrighted by John McFadden, May 2010.