Holding a grudge and not telling the person why is like spitting into the wind. Holding a grudge will destroy you. It heals nothing. It shows your real (poor) character. If you can’t forgive, don’t expect others to forgive you. Grudges block forgiveness and happiness. Forgive, forget, and don’t hold grudges. Holding a grudge is a sign it’s time to heal thyself. A grudge hurts you more than the other person.
Want to be Happy and Joyful? Put social media aside because Comparison is the Thief of Joy. You have a choice. Run Your Own Race! Become your Authentic Self. “To Thine Own Self Be True” Shakespeare. It’s up to you. Choose wisely.
Happiness and Success it up to YOU!
It’s in your power to have anything you want.
Everybody has control over who you are and through the power of thought and practice you are able to change and become your true self, your authentic self. This is a great talk about how to do it.
Are you who you want to be? Even aging Baby Boomers can change.
Thanks for stopping by, John
Our minds can be our worst enemy or our best friend and most powerful tool. It’s up to you because you thoughts and words create your life. Best advice for happiness and getting what you want, Mind Your Thoughts!
Here, HackSpirit.com gives us tips to deal with Anxiety.
Anxiety is more of a curse than anything else. You can’t cure it with the perfect medicine, and it doesn’t go away passively like a cold.
Anxiety demands your attention, while making you more fearful of giving it your attention the closer you look at it.
But deep down, defeating anxiety consists of taking part in a power struggle for your brain. Ridding yourself of anxiety is a mental exercise; keeping it away is a mental habit.
This is where adopting mindful attitudes can be hugely beneficial.
Here are the 10 best mindful attitudes to rewire your brain to let go of anxiety:
Some of us have issues with the lessons of mindfulness. This comes from the fear of living in the present, because the present isn’t always as great as we want it to be.
By living with mindfulness, they believe that they are withholding from themselves the ability to disengage or escape.
But that’s exactly what mindfulness tries to teach—not every moment can be positive or beautiful, and not every moment should be positive or beautiful.
We must learn to live with every moment, even the ones that we dislike, because those are the ones we learn from most.
One of our greatest sources of anxiety is the fear that we can’t fix everything and we can’t make everything right.
Take a minute every day to stop and tell yourself, “That’s right—I can’t fix everything.” Accept the limitations of your being and you will be happier with what you have seen yourself accomplish.
Free up the energy and time that would rather have been spent worrying about things out of your control.
Don’t judge yourself and don’t push yourself too hard. Do as much as you can and find peace.
The modern world makes it so hard to live in the present. We’re always dreaming of future wants and needs; we’re always looking at great pictures of past events; and we’re always distracting ourselves from the present moment with social media and technology.
There’s one thing you need to do, and only one: Stop. Engage with your present in the way you would want others to engage with you—with their full attention.
Feel the moment as it passes knowing that it will never return; do not hold anything against it simply because it isn’t an amazing moment. Engage with your senses and open your mind.
These days, too many people think they know everything. We are always trying to predict, to foresee, to judge before we know the full story. But this ruins the way we experience events, because we are always ready to say “Ha! I told you so!”
Stop trying to prove yourself to the world. You don’t have to know everything, so why bother? Let life take you down a road without predicting every part of the path for once, and you will understand the true joy of what it’s like to be genuinely surprised.
Too often, we are taught to resist. To fight against change, to keep things the way we want them to stay, and to do everything in our power to make sure tomorrow is exactly like today.
But the world doesn’t operate according to your whims and fancies; the world changes, and this is a part of reality.
So the best way to deal with this? Accept it. Surrender. Let go, and flow with the waves that are pushing you a certain direction. Who knows—you may find something better on the other side.
The modern world has turned all of us into a pile of neurotics. We obsess over knowledge and information and knowing, and any time we don’t know, we are just a few thumb presses away from Google.
Simply put, we are taught that we have to know everything, and that not knowing is something to be ashamed about.
But constantly labeling everything will make things less organic, less natural. Try to step back and let life unfold naturally, without you forcing it to happen faster than it can.
Breathe, exist, and interact, and if you don’t know something, then, well, you don’t know.
How do you achieve your dreams? There are thousands of people who have earned everything they ever wanted, even if they came from nothing. The answer? They took a leap of faith. They put everything they had into their dreams and said, “F*ck it, let’s go.”
They trusted the Universe, or God, or something; something greater than them, to help lead them on their way to their hopes and dreams. You don’t have to be religious to believe that there’s something bigger than you looking out for you. Just the belief is enough to change your whole disposition.
Let’s say you’re traveling somewhere, and you get lost. You might end up getting worried, getting upset.
You check your phone, check the GPS, check the maps, update your social media platforms, call your friends, freak out, and a thousand other things.
But all of these are the wrong answer. Just stop. Stop analyzing, stop overthinking. What has happened has already happened, and the best way to get out of the situation is not to think about every little thing that caused it, but to just keep going on.
Multi-tasking is the bane of a mindful existence. Why do we always have to be busy, why always in a rush? Success, recognition, fame, money—are these really all the things that matter?
Focus. Concentration. Presence. Stability. These can contribute so much more to the current condition of your life than arbitrary goals of success and recognition.
You don’t have to be the best and you don’t have to beat everyone around you. Learn to be present, instead of a shadow moving from one state to another.
Learn to start living your life like someone who is alive.
We can’t always live a peaceful existence. Emotions and reactions are normal, and disagreements happen all the time. Anger, grief, rage, pain—these are parts of life that can’t be avoided.
But grudges? Grudges are unhealthy. They are unnatural. They are no longer emotional reactions, but conscious decisions to continue holding a pain or anger against someone else for something that has already passed.
The one hard truth about grudges is that they hurt you much more than the person you are holding it against.
Why? Because the grudge is always on your mind, while it only affects them when you are around. Start letting go, and start accepting what has happened.
Looking to reduce stress and live a calmer, more focused life? Mindfulness is the easy way to gently let go of stress and be in the moment. It has fast become the slow way to manage the modern world – without chanting mantras or finding hours of special time to meditate.
In Hack Spirit’s new eBook, The Art of Mindfulness, we explain how you can use mindfulness practically to help you clear your mind, let go of your worries and live peacefully in the present moment.
By devoting full attention on what we are doing in the moment, we can alleviate suffering, fear and anxiety.
With the power of mindfulness at our fingertips and the beauty of looking deeply, we can find insights to transform and heal any situation.
Check it out here.
I hope you enjoyed this post. Stop by again. Thanks, John
What is Joy? It’s a noun, “a feeling of great pleasure and happiness”.
But what does it mean to you? Does it have to be “great”? Only big life events, getting married, the birth of a child, a graduation, getting that job you’ve always wanted, buying your first house or having your first book published.
If you only feel Joy when big events occur you’re probably not getting the full dose of Joy that you deserve. There’s so much more Joy to be had. Many times we get so busy, stressed and are living on autopilot that we miss little things that can put a smile on our face and Joy in our heart.
Luckily, you can change that and have more Joy in your life with very little effort. Just change your mindset and expectations. It’s easy to start. When you go about your day practice being present and in the moment and expect to find the Joy all around you. Quiet all the chatter and noise in your head. Take three slow and deep breathes. Focus on what you’re doing each moment. Notice how your body reacting to what you’re doing and adjust your thoughts and actions to feel more relaxed. Look around you for little things that you usually don’t notice. You’ll be surprised by the beauty around you and by peoples acts of kindness. You’ll see others helping each other.
How could you help someone or make them smile and feel good? Open a door for a stranger, carry someones groceries for them. These little gestures will put Joy in their hearts as well as yours.
Through out the day keep your eyes open, notice fresh flowers on the table, the wildflowers that grow among the weeds on the side of the road. What do you see in the cloud formations? Use your imagination, see the angel or the horse in the clouds?
I hope this encourages you to slow down, calm your thoughts and open your eyes to the Joy that can be found if you just look.
Thanks for stopping by. Share with your friends if you like.
Photos copyrighted by John McFadden, Permission required to use.
No matter where you are in life humans tend to doubt and second guess their motivations and actions from time to time. They question their purpose, their reason for living, does their life mean something, are they valued. Maybe it’s time to rethink these questions and be sure you’re living authentically.
Watch this video to learn how Ben Angel says to find your purpose using 3 key emotions.
http://www.success.com/videos/youtube/how-to-find-your-purpose
Best-selling author of CLICK, Sleeping Your Way to The Top in Business and Flee 9-5, is Australia’s leading marketing authority.
Finding your purpose can be a long journey full of twists and turns, but that’s OK—and even recommended. You can only discover your life’s mission by exposing yourself to new experiences, and that’s what prepares you to step into your purpose.
This kind of experimentation brings people closer to their deepest desires. It’s the gradual process of exploring and shaping oneself for the next chapter of their life that makes the difference. But when the mind gets stuck, focusing heavily on the absence of purpose, embracing the process can be a challenge.
No one was put on earth to do just one thing. That kind of lifestyle would only rob people of the experiences that create the person they are becoming. Without those challenges, no one would have the resilience to live out their true purpose in life.
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Hope you enjoyed this little tidbit today. You can Subscribe, on the right side of this page, if you’d like to be notified of future posts.
Thanks for stopping buy, John
We all want to be Happy, right? Sometimes happiness escapes us, including Baby Boomers, and Grandpas, especially when we go through life changing events such as retirement. An event like that can turn every part of our lives upside down. Don’t worry there is help and there’s always HOPE. Learn to Be Your Best.
This article from addicted2success.com (move down for article) can help you get back on you’re real path to happiness and the life you’ve always wanted.
Dwelling on our flaws makes it exceedingly difficult to achieve happiness in our lives.
Accepting ourselves and being kind to ourselves increase our enjoyment, resilience, and well-being.
Once you start noticing the world around you, you will begin to appreciate it that much more. If you’ve ever felt that there has to be more to life, you’d be safe in your assumptions. You just need to stop every now and then so you can take the time to appreciate what’s out there.
You have to have goals in order to feel good about the future. That takes direction and motivation. Our goals must be challenging yet realistically achievable. Attempting the impossible creates undue stress. However, choosing ambitious goals gives us direction.
Regularly experiencing positive emotions such as contentment, gratitude, inspiration, and pride helps us to develop our resources.
It helps us focus on the positive aspects in our lives (the glass is half full, not half empty).
Your mind is connected with your body. So when we are active it not only benefits our physical health, it makes us happier. Our moods improve and we can even lift ourselves out of depression as a result.
Interestingly enough, our activities do not have to involve complex exercises. There are simple things that we can do every day so that we are more active.
Caring about others and doing for others is vital to a person’s happiness. When we give to others or help them, it makes us happier and we become healthier in the process.
Giving helps us to create a better society. However, it also helps us to develop stronger connections with those around us.
People feel more in control, get more out of their efforts, and are typically happier when their lives have meaning and purpose. Plus, they experience less anxiety, depression, and stress in their lives.
Relating with others is quite possibly the greatest contributor to our happiness. Individuals who have broader, stronger relationships with others are happier and healthier. It also helps us to live longer.
We can increase our self-worth by developing close relationships with our family members and friends.
All of us have experienced failure, loss, stress, and trauma in our lives. However, it is the way we react and respond to these issues that can have a huge impact on our lives and well-being. In other words, it is the way that we bounce back when we get knocked down.
There are a number of positive benefits to learning. You get exposed to new ideas which enables you to stay curious and learn new things.
We become more resilient and improve our self-confidence, eventually gaining a sense of accomplishment.
Closing note: if you unscramble the first letter of each component above (A, A, D, E, E, G, M, R, R, and T) it spells “GREAT DREAM”.
The Holiday Season, yes Christmas, and other faith based holidays are known to be stressful for lots of people including Baby Boomers and many people around the world. Today, I’d like to give you these 10 Blessings. Keep your dreams alive and set high expectations for your life. You can keep these words in your heart and mind and make good use of them. Share them with others who need to know that someone cares for them.
May your Holidays and the coming new year be the best ever for you and yours.
Thanks for stopping by. Come back soon, John
Ah, Happiness, that sometimes elusive emotion we all strive for. Now that we Baby Boomers are in our 50’s and 60’s, retirement is on the horizon, Happiness can, but shouldn’t, seem even more elusive. After all, our bodies are changing, our minds are changing, we change jobs or retire and most of our kids have left the nest. Hopefully, they haven’t had to come back, yet.
This is a lot of change happening in our personal universe all at the same time. Some of us adapt to these changes easily and quickly. “The good news is that with age comes happiness,” said study author Yang Yang, a University of Chicago sociologist. “Life gets better in one’s perception as one ages.” And Duke University aging expert Linda George say, an older person may realize “it’s fine that I was a schoolteacher and not a Nobel prize winner.” I believe we all have special talents and skills and we are perfect the way we are.
Others, maybe not so much. Seriously, this is a lot for our brains, bodies, pride and egos to handle.
So, how do we deal with aging and continue to live life with zest and swagger? Here are some tips on how to become and stay a Happy Baby Boomer.
1. Life is Simple. don’t get bogged down with all the little details, keep loving yourself, happiness comes from acceptance-of yourself, your situation, your challenges and “who” you are; remain true to yourself.
2. Realize that life “is what it is“, in other words we’re gonna get older no matter what, we can’t stop aging. “It’s all good“, meaning just deal with it, and make life a good experience. We might as well, “enjoy life, there’s plenty of time to be dead.” (TEDX Pune, Aisha Chaudhari, Being Happy and Living in the Moment.).
3. Realize Happiness is a chosen Attitude, it only comes from within our minds. Choose to be happy, focus your thoughts on good things, be grateful for what we have, and control your thoughts. You can say to yourself, “I Declare I am Happy”, or “I choose to be happy today”. Block out the negative ones. We must become the Master of Our Brains. Our brains are just like the worlds’ best computers, they do what we tell them to do. At least most of the time. So, tell your Master Computer Brain to Be Happy.
4. Be in the present and expect an awesome future. Don’t get stuck in the past. As the old saying goes, “That was yesterday, today is TODAY!” We enjoy life more when we focus on the moment, what we’re doing, right now, at this moment. Get lost in it, enjoy it and do your best. However, it’s fine to remember and reminisce about past events and activities and accomplishments. This can cheer you up at a sad time. The key is not to dwell on past regrets. Remember the good times, enjoy the present moment and have something to look forward to in the near future.
5. As for our aging bodies, KEEP ACTIVE! keep working on your Bucket List. That’s the secret. Take walks, alone, with your dog, with a friend or two, no matter how far you can walk. Dance, move that body, all of it, even those hips. Swim, exercise, or learn Tai chi. Even the simplest Yoga stretches and movements help your body and mind be healthier. The better we take care of our body now, the longer it will last. Other ways to feel valuable and to feel satisfied is by volunteering and helping others. There’s hundreds of ways to do this.
6. Chill out. Stop being so serious, relax, tell jokes, sing, get a hobby, Laugh Every Day! Be Social and you’ll keep the blues away. In an ABC news article “81-year-old George O’Hare, a retired Sears manager in Willowbrook, Ill. He’s active with church, AARP and does motivational speaking, too. His wife is still living, and he’s close to his three sons and four grandchildren. “I’m very happy because I’ve made friends that are still living,” O’Hare said. “I like to go out and speak in schools about motivation.” “Happiness is getting out and being with people, and that’s why I recommend it,” he said.
7. Most important learn to Love Yourself and Be Your On Best Friend! The voices in our heads can be very self critical. When that happens tell the voices to go away, scat, and shut up, because they are wrong. We can forgive ourselves for the past and mentally move on to the present. Wake up each morning and count your blessings, own your potential and who you are. Be proud of that and have confidence in it. Imagine what it would be like to best your own best friend, what would you say, how would you act? Now, go do it! Start being your best friend TODAY!
And as a reminder, Happiness leads to success, so why not Get Your Happy On right now!
Thanks for stopping by, I hope you enjoyed this chat, thanks, John